Journey

.oi

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This may seem a little strange to some; however I have scripted so much that I cannot remember if the original of this was something I read and typed up, or something I scripted on my old Apple IIc computer. Whichever it was type on July 27, 1993. I came across it yesterday as I was going through things to get rid of as I prepare for my relocation to Santa Fe New Mexico. If someone reads this and recognizes that it as not something scripted by me and knows who authored it, please let me know. What you see below is revised from the original copy I found.

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This lifetime is a journey of finding my deepest level of truth. Every situation in my life that is causing me to struggle, or causing me pain is an area in which I am learning about being true to my Higher Spiritual Self. I have many roles that I play in this lifetime, and I experience different truths at different times in my sojourn through this dense physical plane. I experience many different truths at different times in life. What is truth? Is truth fluid, and is there a deeper truth that will last from moment to moment? My Higher Spiritual Self, which is my core self holds that deeper truth.

Finding truth means coming from my heart and moving closer to my spirit, the place where I am one with Infinite Source. Finding truth means holding every situation up to the light. What then is light? It comes foremost from the heart and is a deep level of compassion. The Light is the Spirit of Infinite Source within me. In developing the quality of compassion, I will be developing the ability to come from my inner deeper spiritual truth. Compassion is the ability to put myself in the other person’s shoes. What then is the benefit of coming from the deepest spiritual truth? The benefit of coming from the deepest spiritual truth is the joy, the peace, and the serenity that I so desire to manifest and maintain in my life at all times. Truth also comes from the feeling level of existence, our emotions and intuition.

Everyone has the ability to fine tune there sensing of energy, and the sensing of the truth within themselves. I do not have to go through pain and struggle to grow spiritually. The doorway to deeper truth is spiritual awareness. It is paying attention to, and holding up, the vision of truth. The more I act from integrity, the more evolved I become. Every situation in my life that requires truth from me, that requires me to reach into a deeper level of my being is an opportunity for me to grow and expand intellectually and spiritually, which is of the utmost importance to me.

I thank all of those situations that have come into my life, that seem to be difficult and painful. Because I know that they are opportunities for me to reach greater truths and understanding from deep within my spirit. Not a truth that will cause separation, bring anger, vengeance, or justification and make the other person wrong and me right, or vice versa; but a truth that will allow me to connect at a deeper spiritual level, and connect in a greater way with the oneness that the whole of creation is an eternal part of; and to raise my energy to a higher level, go inward and ask if I am withholding from myself the truth of what I feel or think about the others. If I do not allow myself to see the complete truth, I will have another person sent my way with the same lessons until I do get in touch with my deepest truth, and learn the lessons I am supposed to learn.

Every drama in my outer life is a reflection of a drama that is going on within me. Every person I interact with in my outer life symbolizes an interaction of energy that is going on deep within me. Every person and event offers me an opportunity to clean up my energy, evolve myself, and move higher in a wholistic way, in my spirit, mind, and body. The greatest reward is that once an issue is truly cleared up, I will never repeat it and have to deal with it again. No one and nothing can hurt me unless I am hurting myself, and I allow them to do as I am doing. I cannot be betrayed, devalued, or unloved unless I am doing that to myself by not valuing and loving myself. Everything associated with my life always starts with my thinking, words, and actions. Nothing can come from outside of myself and occupy and control me unless I allow it to do so.

I have the greatest power of all, the ability to heal myself by way of Infinite Source dwelling within me. When I heal myself, everything in my surrounding world that represents my inner struggle dissolves. I can heal myself by speaking the truth from a deep level of compassion and conviction. I need to take a look at the different personalities within me. One is very strong, another observes everything I do with detachment, another is young and emotional, and another is very wise. If there is any drama going on around me, I can be assured that there is drama going on inside of me between my various parts. Finding my deepest truth means looking deep within my spirit. It means not blaming other people, not playing the victim and not spending time feeling sorry for myself. When I look deeper into any given situation, I can always see that I set that situation up for my growth. In every situation were I thought or felt that I was the victim I always had and inkling of what was going on, and ignored all of the opportunities to change things.

The pain, anger, and resentment that I feel in life usually always come from similar childhood experiences. Unconsciously I recreate the pain so that I can move beyond it. I now realize that I am receiving some childhood decisions and that now is an opportunity to once and for all end this reoccurring pattern in my life, and come from my inner deepest spiritual truth. I also realize that other people are only drawn into my life to play out certain roles with me to help me to evolve, as I should. I must let go of any anger and/or blame I have towards them.

It has been made clear to me that I have the ability to do all things; I also have the ability to know the truth concerning my life. The truth is I am a Great Spiritual Being like everyone else; because I am one with Infinite Source due to the reality that Infinite Source dwells within my spirit eternally. I have within me the compassion, courage, strength, and wisdom to come from a high spiritual place at all times. I sometimes act out roles that do not always reflect the greatness of who I am, but they are only roles and not my true spiritual self. The more I can be aware of the thoughts coming into my mind, the more control I will have over the drama that is happening inside of me. That is why I must live a totally conscious life, consciously aware of everything in me and around me. Coming from a place of truth is so important; doing so means paying attention to all energy. There are times when I don't notice what is happening until the situation is so painful I must go inward, meditate, think, and put myself in another person’s shoes. If when I began to feel uncomfortable, I immediately went inward and opened my heart with compassion, things would never reach crisis level. Ultimately, I should have been going inward and meditating on a daily basis to start with; neglecting to do so is a major mistake.

Every time I rehearse in my mind that which I will say to others in a positive uplifting way, I am sending positive energy into my future interaction with them. Often I rehearse that so that I will always be coming from a deep more compassionate and spiritual level in my actual communication with others. If I always make this the goal of metal rehearsal I will find all of my relationships clearing up. If I am rehearsing to protect or justify myself or get something from another person, I will find myself very uncomfortable when I am speaking to others. Because of that I will most definitely have an incomplete communication with them, one that will lead to nothing but further struggles. When I find myself reviewing less than pleasant events, I must not condemn myself as being wrong because of how they turned out; I must recognize that I did the best that I knew how to do at that time. I understand that all things work together for the greater good, and every situation no matter how serious it may be, is needed so that I will learn lessons that will help me get back on track. There is no such thing as good or bad, and right or wrong; there are only experiences in life that come to us because we need those experiences to learn lessons in life that will cause us to remember who we are, and expand spiritually from them. Everything in our sojourn through this dense physical plane works together for our ultimate spiritual awakening.

July 7, 1993
(Revised 09.28.12)

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        Affirmation:

Everything Is In Divine Order As We Follow Our Spirits Melody!

So It Eternally Is!

Baba-Kundi Ma`at-Shambhala
(SpiritWalker)
09.28.12